Home is where the Heart is

It is weird to think I am approaching sixth months on post graduation and living in Connecticut. I have had some moments of homesickness, but I think I am finally making my way in this town...

First off, I am blessed to be able to live with my parents for the time being in order to save up money for graduate school and for future expenses.  It is different for me since I never grew up with my biological dad and I am older and living at home but it was a move has been beneficial in my life.  My parents are always looking out for me, making sure I eat (asking what I ate, if I want something to eat, so on), my stepmom will get things for me when she is out (including cookie butter - my favorite thing EVER; winterboots, etc.), supporting my decisions, and so on.  The other day, my dad brought my coffee to drivers ed during break time because I forgot it (and almost scared me half to death when I saw him in peripheral). Also - the next day, I forgot I left my debit card in pants pocket and didn't realize it until I went to buy sparkling waters and a couple of other things at Aldis before work. My dad went through my pants pockets and brought it to me at work.  He also made sure I had an inhaler on me because I left it in my pants too (I had one on me, but I do have a tendency to misplace them - so I have three loose rescue inhalers).

Next - this one was a surprise to me and interesting how it all played out.  I put my two weeks in at Subway last week.  I didn't think I made any impressions during my time there but I guess I did.  The managers, J, at one of the stores I commonly cover shifts for has been interested in having me at her store.  Interestingly enough, she will be transfering to the my "home" store next month.  Upon finding out that I was leaving she was really surprised and encouraged me to stay on (fill in as needed or if my schedule allows it).  I kind of brushed it off and said that it wouldn't be possible - THEN my home store manager, M tried calling and texting me (after a managers meeting from what I found out) and asked if I wanted to stay on rather than quitting... I was surprised but knew that J and my training manager, Sp, wanted me to stay upon hearing I was leaving. I will be staying - I will trying to work on Saturday during November and see how it goes.  Like M said, it would be good for me to stay on in case the other job didn't work out or something came up.

Then I have found a home church only a half a mile away from my house.  This was the first church I visited upon moving (and I visited one winter break prior to a merger) and was immediately included. I have to thank R for making me welcome and for including me (granted I give her grief now)  The first visit to church I was invited to a ladies meeting at Panera after church - I was super nervous but met several people that were close in age and were super friendly, and since then have became friends with them. They have also made me feel welcome in the community.  Since that meeting, i have been to several more of the Panera Bread meetings, potluck meals after church, a choir interest meeting, worship nights, and to help in children's church.

Speaking of children's church - it feels so good to be working with kiddos in the ministry again! I was hesitant to jump back into ministry again (I did Sunday School, bus ministry, and youth choir prior) but I am glad I did. That is a gift that God has given me and I have seen it, especially when during my time at camp and how challenging days were but my love for those kids made it worth.  At this church, I am one of the adult (seems so weird to me) helpers and get to work with teenagers starting out in the children's ministry.  It is pretty cool to give them pointers and tips from my experience with teaching Sunday School, helping with VBS, and working in bus ministry. The kids have grown on me too... This was seen in a text that I got from R that her daughter said that children's church was fun out of nowhere (like that made my entire day, so much I kept the screen shot) and when one of the kiddos asks me if I am teaching/helping and wants to sit on my lap (or melt haha).

Things are slowly coming into place for me here. I know my way pretty well around Bristol (and I am still willing to walk places) and I am learning places around Bristol (I know Southington, Waterbury, and Plainville okay - Wolcott and Terryville are very pretty).  I also have some local favorite places I love to go to - like Memorial Boulevard Park (I enjoy when i can go through the park and sit at the benches, see the trees, etc), Supernatural Deli (I am not a foodie but I love the fact that their food is fresh), the library, and Rockwell Park.

I am also going to the gym regularly at Planet Fitness (well 2 to 3 times a week) - at least the front desk people are pretty familiar with me. I have also achieved some fitness goals of mine (i.e. running 20 minutes straight without stopping, learning resistances machines, and incorporating yoga into my routines) - and I am toning up in my arms - which I never expected.

Stay tuned for more adventures with the new job, finding out about graduate school, and of course, the holidays (and who doesn't love Christmas music)

Misadventures of Day to Day life.... where is the instruction manual when you need it?

It has been five months since graduating from Catawba and two months since I have been back and adjusting to Bristol from Kenmont/Kenwood camps... Life after graduation and in general isn't always the most straight forward - and boy have I really learn that... And sometimes, life feels like a sitcom filled with plenty of plot twists.

First off, I moved in with my [biological] dad and stepmom after graduation - their way of doing things and house is much different than growing up with my [biological] mom and then living on my own at college and with my "adopted" parents during college.  This has been quite a transition and I have been open about how different it is for me... Add to it the fact that I now reside in a new state - away from family and friends and my comforts (church, woods, stores, friends close by)... I find myself homesick sometimes for little things, like Olive Garden, Mexican Restaurants, the Preserve at Catawba, advice from my favorite people, etc.

However, aside from the transition and homesickness, living in CT has taught me a couple of things.  I recently got a job at a call center for a health insurance company nearby my house.  I start this in November and it will help me save up [a lot more] money in order to attend graduate school and potentially live on campus [instead of renting an apartment - at least for time being].  I took a job where getting more than 10-15 hours is challenging especially with lack of a vehicle and lack of access to public transportation to the other store [where I could pick up more hours]  In retrospect, I jumped to this job because I needed money, rather than waiting on the right opportunity to come my way... I do put my two weeks notice in this week, which I have mixed feelings about since I have learned a lot and have grown to enjoy being around the people I work with.  I also have my work for Dr. Koster - which is still freelancing but is limited - work definitely waxes and wanes (guess that is what happens when you are a freelancer)...

Also, another huge thing I learned is take a chance and go for something even if it seems unreal.. I started over - scary enough as it is, and I am also trying to find a masters program I want in order to pursue my passion [for research].  I made the decision to reach out to Dr. A.B at CCSU (per suggestion of Dr. H) and I am glad I did... [She] seems interested in working with, took 2 and half hours to talk to me, and I definitely felt the vibes that I felt at Catawba.  I went to open house and definitely felt prepared after having that connection and having talked about what to expect. I was able to get my application in for free with a fee waiver and still have to work on a personal statement and letters... I am excited for the idea of potentially being able to attend graduate school... Even if it means long hours in class, lab, and working a job - It will be worth it when I have the degree in the end!

Will update more in the near future - stay tuned!

October is here... and updates

So... one thing I didn't expect after graduating undergrad was for things to be this complicated. With this, one of the main things for me is finding a job that makes me happy and will help me become a better person.  I have had eight different jobs since 2014: I have worked at Jersey Mikes, as a psychology work study, a Public Relations work study, a tutor, a SI leader, an intern for the environmental health department, a camp counselor, freelancer for nonprofit, and Subway. (Out of all of these, the jobs I have enjoyed were being an SI leader, camp counselor, working at the env. health department (my favorite by far), and freelancing)  My experiences all are over the board - I have the most experience in communications, children, and mosquitoes - but I have very little experience in customer service, retail, office skills, etc. Which is frustrating - and add into the mix not having my drivers license can make things very tricky... Along with finding a job that allows for me to save an adequate amount of money to pursue my goals and subsist on. 

Second thing - graduate school. Last week, I was able to visit my first choice graduate school (CCSU) and meet up with a potential mentor.  She was very amazing - I felt like I was back at Catawba.  She spent 2 and half hours  talking with me - which was surprising. All of this was very exciting, including hearing about the classes I would get to take, working on a project, and possibly working with the CT agricultural station... There is a catch-22 - I need to find a topic to pursue to begin rolling the balls with grant writing, I have to have some money to put towards an application, tuition, jobs or if I can get stipends, and whether I will be accepted and do well.  I also need to look at other programs, in which I have to take the GRE - which quite honestly I don't want to do but it will have to do if I choose Southern or UConn.

All of this is pretty overwhelming at times - not going to lie.  However, I am determined to push through the job situation (including back to job search AGAIN) and if graduate school is meant to be, it will happen. I have full support system behind me and have someone else going through the same hurdles as I am with the grad school applications and figuring out what to do... so I am not alone in this.

Also - aside from the chaos that has been all consuming from grad school, life, and job searching... CT has been great! I have gotten the chance to visit some of the parks, various parts of CT (including Kent, New Milford, New Britain, Bristol, and Hartford) and have even done some of the local events that is common in Bristol - including the Mum Festival (not the parade though) and an event at Rockwell Park (that I just drew a blank on).  Still working on finding a church - but I have two in mind that I really like... hopefully once I start driving I can visit more in the local area.

Reflection Time

 This past week was my first week working at Subway.  I like the fact that the hiring manager and the store manager that I did my training under are very friendly, kind, and passionate about what they do.  I learned a bit about businesses that I didn't know before/or realize.  For example, if the business is down at a store, they are likely to cut back hours or transfer the employees to other stores.  Also - didn't realize until recently that money that is made either through business or commission is important for payroll. I also do enjoy the fast pace that Subway has during the shifts - it is constant with making subs, cash register, customer service, keeping the place clean (I was stoked that they actually have to-do lists!), and stock.

In the meantime, I am trying to get into the habit of going to the gym consistently... even if I don't want to walk 2 miles to the gym from my house... (although I am a fairly motivated person and I love the feeling I get after I work out).  I am also hoping to be able to run for long periods of time (I really want to push through running without fear of my asthma flaring up holding me back), utilize yoga into my workouts (before and after main workout), and become more toned.  Right now, I have a Pinterest board dedicated to yoga - so I hope to keep learning more about poses and which ones that help my body with movement... (Maybe pick up some grace in my life with yoga but who am I kidding - I fell the other day walking and constantly run into things)

Also, another goal of mine is to learn to budget in a way that works for me... I have heard different things about opening savings account (1+), balancing my finances (or balancing a checkbook - but I have used Excel before), and living as if I have very little money.  I like all of these ideas but I need to utilize what is best for me to do. I like to think I am on the frugal side - especially with my hygiene stuff, medicine + supplements, and foodstuff.  However, I do tend to spend more on shoes (and for good reason - haha) and have gotten into the habit of eating out/lazily - so I do need to stick with good... So my goal for next month is to have a running Excel sheet for expenses and to monitor what is in my bank account more closely.

Also, my parents are having the floors redone, so I will have the opportunity to learn New Britain and fingers crossed to visit CCSU tomorrow :).

"Adulting"

So - not too much has happened since I left Vermont.  Things have been busy with filling out online job applications, in person job applications, interviews, a job offer, waiting to hear back from this places, reaching out for a faculty member to research with in Graduate School, and so on.

I have had several interviews now - and waiting.  I have one offer and a 50/50 shot at a job at Walgreens.  At the job interview for Walgreens, the manager asked how I would feel about working in the pharmacy - especially with my biology degree.  This was an option without needing licensure but I would still be able to work in the back.  The Subway Position is on the table but I would likely to take the Walgreens job if they were to offer it to me before I begin.  I also had an interview at Kohls - in form of a group interview - which was different.  There was another interview opportunity but I had an appointment that would have conflicted with it. I am happy with something because I am bored out of my mind and need activities to do to occupy my time until I attend graduate school. The job search is a frustrating and tedious one with A LOT of things that come up - including not hearing back, rejections, online sites that have numbers to call, etc.

Speaking of graduate school - I have heard back from the faculty member I would like to work with  (medical entomology - yay).  I am also planning on visiting the open house in October and maybe even visit the campus if I can. I can't wait to jump back into research!

Also - I recently joined Planet Fitness - mainly because running and the elements are not in my favour (even though I am in a place with different allergy seasons etc). But I am determined to be as active as I can and to take care of my health.  Speaking of health, I had my first annual physical (aside from just a normal asthma appointments/sick visits in the past).  I had a slip up with not realizing these blood tests are fasting based - and I drank coffee this morning with milk - and found out after from my stepmom that can cause problems (In my defense I was asked if I ATE anything - not asked about drinking anything).

And I finally have a plan of action for asthma.  I decided to try Fluticasone spray, in addition to my two inhalers - and if there is no difference then try Singulair. (I really don't take pills but if I have too). And for the event of being sick - I would go visit the doctor and get prescribed a short round of predisone (so I don't have weeks of attacks and symptoms - I am slightly struggling with exercise)...

And in other news - learning to budget and efficiently save money --> because of insurance (medical and car), plane tickets, probable rent, graduate school fees, etc. Time for the spreadsheets!

Patience is a virtue?

I want to write about a concept that we are taught from a young age and is a necessary concept throughout one's life.  Patience is a virtue...

So, I am the type of person who is very patient with other people (I was once told I had the patience of Job by one of my professors after I let another student talk to her in the middle of an ongoing conversation and waited until he was done speaking to her).  I have worked with young children, been with special needs individuals, and children/ teenagers from the worst of situations at my old church and at camp.  This helped me develop a strong sense of patience especially when a child is slow in cleaning up, challenges in getting to places, has a problematic behavior, so on. Yet --- I have a hard time waiting for things in my life... especially now as an adult!?!?!

I have had several instances in my of having to wait on things to happen:  I started my undergraduate career a semester later than I planned on... And because of this, I had to start my major courses later than those who came in during the fall with decided majors because of limited class availability... but I was able to go to school to fulfill my dream of going to college...  Then at the end of my junior year, I learned I would be graduating with an extra semester and a semester later due to the changes in my degree (from psychology, both psychology and biology, to a BS in biology - to a BA - not once - BUT TWICE) and needing classes to fulfill graduation requirements.  This wasn't a bad thing - I graduated with three minors, took art classes, got a research and conference opportunity, and got to graduate with my friends who graduated in May.

Now for those who know me - I have yet to get my license. Partly, because I was in circumstances I couldn't control in high school and the other part lack of time to put into driving and a rough time with driving lessons in NC because of unresolved vision issues and anxiety.  NOW, at 24 years old I am attending drivers education for adults and driving lessons that my parents did for a graduation gift.  Again, I had to wait to start them because I took a job offer at Kenmont/Kenwood camp over the summer.... But thankfully my dad understands because he got his drivers license in his mid-late twenties. AND I WILL BE BEYOND GRATEFUL FOR MY LICENSE!

And lastly, patience is needed for job searching and graduate school... I have been applying like crazy to many different places... I have a limited selection until after December and when I get my license - so I am focused on retail, grocery, and food jobs... I got a job offer for Subway - and I have 10 days out until I start and I will have some limited hours (at first - but then once I am trained I can ask for more hours and be placed at other stores... surprisingly A LOT of subways are in Bristol).  However, there may be a possible chance I may need to switch to a place with more hours or add a second PT job - but I won't know until I find out what my hours are and of course when I get my license. But for now, I have a job and they were impressed with my patience and understanding during the interview and my work ethic.

Then this leads to the last thing - graduate school... GAP years are not for the impatient... thankfully I took it because unless I cloned myself senior year, I would have never had the money, time, or ability to apply for graduate school.  Application fees are hefty, there is so much time that goes into writing personal narratives, tracking down three recommendations, resumes, financial aid, contacting who you want to work with, etc.  And when I start my masters it will be the greatest feeling ever - well aside from the stress that will come with thesis of course!  So all in all, patience is a good thing but it can be a challenging thing. Having to wait for things to happen isn't always bad as in my case but it is difficult, especially as a young adult finding her way in the world...

Who am I and Who I am

I want to warn readers that this blog will be slightly philosophical in nature. This question is something I wanted to blog about after watching Mayim Bialik's videos and what it means for me now in this stage of my life.  These are common questions we wonder about from time to time, especially as young adults. Who am I? Where will I go to school, graduate school, work? What am I doing with my life? Will I fit in? Will I get married... etc. the list goes on and on.  

In several videos by Mayim Bialik, she talks about never fitting in and being a geeky mom.  NOW... this was surprising to me because she is super amazing to me. Especially since there are many people out there that are doing well in life but still feel like they aren't good enough or they don't fit in... She is an actress, got her Ph.D. in neuroscience, and is very adamant about what she stands for.  She is confident about herself/life, dresses modestly in public, and sticks to her morals/values, which I can only imagine as being difficult in Hollywood. 

Several months ago now, I moved to Connecticut after spending 20 years of my life in North Carolina and four and half years at a small college, where I felt the most comfortable... I felt like I lost part of my life - where there were people who understood my quirkiness, strengths, and likes/dislikes.  Yet - what I failed to realize was that I am still me.  My life has been influenced by so many people, from friends, church family, to mentors/professors. I still think about Dr. C showing me images of spiders and explaining the different species every time I go out with my camera or see a spider. I think about how taking creative writing in high school helped me realize my potential as a writer - even though I didn't want to for a while and how I am writing in my field now as a freelancer.  And also the influence of Dr. H as a mentor on my career path and how at times it seems like I am a bit like her (and so people say).  I think back to the day in Panera Bread when she asked me if I wanted to do research with her or making fun of her for studying mosquitoes and belly bacteria. And the list can go on and on... 

With this said, I am in the process of finding temporary jobs until I start graduate school and assistantship programs. It is easy to become discouraged and feels like I am not going in the right direction or feel "stuck" (a term I often use) sometimes. But with confidence is slowly building, I know who I am and where I am going - even if it doesn't seem clear at times. At the end of the day, I am glad that I have my four-year degree, have been able to have the opportunities research/intern/present, and am able to pursue a freelance job. I am strong, independent, compassionate, passionate, patient, creative, free-spirited, and active person.