Before this month ends, I want to take time to write on the topic of mental illness. Many people are affected by a mental illness(es) or know someone who has a mental illness. Having a mental illness can be seen as a stigma by society and can affect someone reaching out for proper help and receiving the appropriate treatment. But what many people don’t realize is having a mental illness isn’t a bad thing.
Aside from my interest in psychology, I have been affected by mental illness, both my own and others I know.
I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD). These don’t define me but they are just a part of my jourrney.
OCD is disorder where a person has obsessions and compulsions (although I did see a The Mighty article that talked about OCD- that can manifest as solely obsessions). A common myth about OCD is that a person with OCD is super meticulous and hate disorganization. I have had symptoms of OCD since I was in elementary school. It started off as an obsession with contamination (I had the classic hand washing symptom) but as I got older I started to obsess over other things including streaks on things around the house (I would clean something over and over), checking locks, and re-doing assignments (I went through notebook paper like crazy). In middle school, I started obsessing over my weight, leading to skipping meals, checking weight repeatedly, and exercise. I was 13 years old when I was put on Zoloft, which changed my life. I was on Zoloft for 7 years, but stopped taking it a year and a half ago. I am more stable than I was as a child. However, I do have obsessions, but compulsions are very covert and manageable. They include numbers (GPA, weight), repeatedly asking for reassurance, etc.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufqFO5B1vQY
GAD is chronic low-grade anxiety with physiological symptoms. These physiological symptoms include increased heart rate, increased urge to go to the bathroom, sweating, increased blood pressure, fatigue, irritability, and the list goes on. I was diagnosed with GAD my junior year of high school. I was constantly running to the bathroom, I would sweat through my clothes, had muscle tension constantly, and fatigue so strong that I would come home from school and took naps on my bedroom floor. This tends to be under control (without medicine – although I took it short -term my senior year in high school) except for during times of high stress.
Having these two disorders has taught me a few things. The first thing it taught me is to take care of myself. I struggle more with anxiety when I am hungry, overtired, and when I have an illness. So remembering to eat, sleep, and be well is very important in managing the disorders. Second, catharsis is very important. I have a few people that I can vent to when I am upset or something is bothering. I also write and draw. Third, having a support net is always a good thing. My close friends/a couple of professors that encourage me during the rough times and genuinely love me.
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